Detachment except from cashmere

Feeling content with one’s self is certainly quite an accomplishment.  Feeling absolutely, 100% at ease and happy in the skin we are in.  No envy for others, no fault with the world, untroubled, carefree and satisfied with life.

Anybody who lives in todays society and falls within a certain age range, that range of which is ever expanding, is never completely fulfilled and anyone who claims they are, well it will take a lot of convincing and the only person who you must convince is yourself. 

I have to say… that I could not feel happier than I do right now.   Others will question it, but the justification is not necessary.  What can I say?  I have found a place where I want to be.  I know what I need to make me happy.  After reading an article about turning a certain age (I am no where near that age) it got me thinking.  Make a decision and stick to it, hit certain targets before you reach the end.   So in following this, I made a few decisions.  Being independent is vital. Realizing that I don’t need to be in a relationship is vital.  Now I have embraced that, I have to say I cannot be happier.  I have found a new love that comes in the form of a cashmere poncho!  Cost a small fortune but it was worth every penny! 

It keeps me warm, makes me feel special and bar getting stolen or leaving it on the train, it will never leave me!  Sounds very sad I know but there it is.  I am in love with my poncho.  There is always a BUT to this.  Being a Jain, albeit not a very good one in that I don’t really follow all the rules,  although I practice yoga  4 times a week….. totally going off the subject….what was I saying., yes, Jainism.  I am reading a mesmerising book entitled 9 Lives.  The story I am currently reading relates to a beautiful girl who becomes a Muni.  Within this chapter, the fundamentals of Jainism are explained, 1 of which I was aware of but did not pay too much attention to.  This being non-attachment.   When you stop obsessing about certain things, one being finding love, and accept a form of anonymity, an aura of happiness glides over you and hovers there like a light.   This is the only for of detachment I Can make just now, because as we all know, being a fashionista and designer, ones life revolves around being attached to ones commodities- my Cashmere Poncho for one!!   As per always, I digress, what I mean is, if you make a decision, and in my case it is concentrate on fulfilling dreams, goals, finish that book, memorize a piece of violin music, learn a new language.  When you take away the pressures that almost mold your everyday, a sense of liberation overcomes you and the feeling is liberating.

A not so idyllic life

An idyllic life as portrayed by a realist.

In MY ideal world, I would have a beautiful home with a fabulously successful husband.  We would have a few children (I haven’t quite decided how many) and a nanny for when we go to work.  We would have an apartment in Paris and a beach home in the Maldives and have great parties.  

That is the world of an idealist.  I am a realist.  The story is very different. It is not really a story.  It is reality

In the REAL world, this is what happens.  You wake up in the morning and turn on the radio to hear of more blood shed across the globe.  You look out the window to see how the weather looks and expect it to be consistent with the season, but it is raining, and dark and miserable.   It is Summer.

You look in your wardrobe and have no idea what to wear,  you look across to where the love of your life is supposed to be lying.  The space is empty.  He is no longer there.

The world is an ever-changing place.  Society is selfish and honest mortals, are a dying breed and “ever lasting love” is certainly a sentiment that once existed.

Life now is busy.  Life is a competition.  What I talk about is that of what occurs in the Western World……not life in Kalash.  Existence has become more of a chore, make money, find the ideal mate, have some children, don’t leave it so late.  RULES RULES RULES!.

When I began writing this, I had some idea about where it would end, but where does it end?  

Is there really such an act of Privacy?

What is the meaning of privacy?

Is it shutting the door behind you and locking it and claiming anonymity from the world?

Is it writing a journal with all the thoughts and events of the day?

As far as I todays interpretation of privacy is understood, there is little chance of maintaining any real freedom from interference!

With the likes of Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook and many more social feeds where by the citizens of the world are persistently updating their lives to inform all and sundry of what is transpiring from minute to minute.

We are all guilty of it to some extent apart from perhaps the older generations who remain oblivious to all that is social media.  A more naïve attitude to technology is something I favor. 

It has been said that freedom of expression is the bedrock upon which a democracy is built.

Society is readily willing to express themselves, in my opinion a little too freely, but then why do “we” protest from the invasion of privacy?

Privacy, in my opinion goes hand in hand with trust.  One requires their privacy, but because of rise in cynicism, it goes hand in hand with trust.  If you are in a relationship, why are individuals who make up this “team” so precious with their phones, laptops, tablets etc.   Why are facebook passwords never disclosed?

Why are we so eager (and by we, I mean the general population,  and I am proud not to be privy to this) to disclose our deepest secrets and feelings over social networking forums yet deadly opposed to sharing a password or allowing a preview into ones phone with those we claim we love?

We live in a world of hypocrisy and anarchy.   A society that curses the media and the paparazzi for reporting on matters that we in turn report ourselves.  Celebrity status seems to be what many crave and thus by advertising themselves over social media feeds, racking up the followers and the friends etc, people, in their minds, believe they have made it.  I am not saying that I am against the acts of social media, I mean, I would be lost without it.  What I object to are those who mock, hate, sue the media yet are the very people who are advertising themselves over the internet with their very own fingers.

Take me back to a time of the letter, the notebook,, the face to face meetings.  Take me back to a time when you couldn’t be tracked or find a loved one is dishonest through a text.  Take me back to a time when the meaning of the word privacy meant just that….

the state or condition of being free from being observed or disturbed by other people: she returned to the privacy of her own home.

• the state of being free from public attention: a law to restrict newspapers' freedom to invade people's privacy.

The Extinction of the Love letter

So I needed to re-visit the matter of online dating .  With a nation so consumed by online shopping and finding anything one desires on the world wide web, is it any wonder that that spills over into finding “love” over the internet?

We look for cars, we buy stocks and shares, we find outfits and in the same breath, we shop for our partner.  We choose height, colour, ethnicity, career, not unlike shopping for a sweater no less..  The other quite disturbing reality is, if we don’t like what we get, we can trade them in or just return the “item”.

Is it any surprise the divorce rate is as high as it is?  Once you have “outgrown” one marriage, go on-line and pick another potential partner! 

The online dating affair saddens me.  Texting and not talking is disheartening,.  Emailing and not writing letters, a myth to the new generations.   In this age of email, fax, instant messaging, nothing can really replace the love letter.  Does any one still write love letters?  Is the romanticism of the love letter really dead?

Love does not last in this day and age.  The days when lovers were separated by great wars yet kept the amour alive through letters is over.  Life has been overtaken by technology and romance and trying has taken a back seat and thus resorting to online dating. 

I can’t help but wish we lived in the time of the greats after reading great love letters…. Horatio Nelson to Emma Hamilton or Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart to Constanze Mozart, Benjamin Franklin to Madame Brillion… to name but a few.

I can’t help but feel that in the year 2013, people are less romantic and more cynical or is it, in years gone by, people were less self conscious than we are today.  They certainly did not hide behind a computer screen.

In conclusion… and on a tangent to where I began, we as a society have become more barbarian and have lost faith both in love itself and in the art of expression. 

Time Passes Us By

Has it really been almost 2 years since my last entrance into the realm of blogomania?!?
I guess it has.  I did endure a little scare actually, hence the sudden and somewhat abrupt stop to my blogging.  One being it all got a little too personal and dark and really the idea of this page was an outlet but not one that can see into the soul!  I mean the eyes are a window to the soul and thus there is really no reason to write it al down and make it so very easy to allow people to understand the complexification that is I!

So, what have I learnt in the last 2 years that is differs from the thoughts I had when informing the world before.....
Well, not a lot really.  The country has fallen into a recession beyond repair mostly affecting those such as I in the Architecture world leaving me and several thousand other Architects to defend for themselves both mentally and financially.  Due to this poor state of affairs (no pun intended), this has led to a fall in confidence, low self esteem and severe boredom.  I mean, if I was super dumb and had little or nothing going on up there in my head, I would be loving life right now.  Sitting all day everyday watching day time tv, living off benefits, eating my family out of house and home, but no.  That's not me!  I have 2 degrees, about to embark on my third, high expectations, a mond that works overdrive, an IQ of 169 and an obsession for all things NICE!.

Yes..... 2 things to pick up there.  My embarkation into degree number 3 will be Law.  I figure or rather it has been reported that the building trade will not pick up until at least 2017 and to be honest if I wait that long, I am sure i will be dead!  I wonder if it is possible to die from boredom.  Exhausted of being bored!
The other notable fact is that my taste in all things nice, have very large price tags. Having started dating a fellow wealthy pot, I had the need to invest in classic pieces that included the likes of Manolo and Prada and garments that were 100% cashmere or silk .  Another story and one not to be blogged!

Wisdom

I have been taking life way too seriously so in a plee, to myself, to lighten up
These are my new terms, some are just for a laugh.....


1.. If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out.

2. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

3. Going to church doesn't make you religious any more than going to a garage makes you a mechanic.

4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.

6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance..

7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.

8. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.

9.. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.

10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.

11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks..

12. A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.

14. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.

15. No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes.

16. A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

17. Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.

18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.

19. Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.

20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.

21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

22. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.

23. Thou shall not weigh more than thy refrigerator.

24. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.

25. Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.

It is not all bad

Text from note:


Suffocating with life in general?
Well I was a little until I stubbled upon some ab- fab ( excuse the 80's lingo) advice!
So having been single for a few months now, I have been obsessing ever so slightly at the face that I may never be married. The I took I step back, entered an imaginary alternate universe and thought.
● is it actually being married that I want or just a wedding and the excuse to shop and dress like a princess for the day?
●I have listened to girl friends complain insesantly about the husbands, boyfriends, partners and I smile politely and give the best advice I can- this does not apply to my bear.
●I sometimes look at the league table asking myself if he is way out of my league? Then I look at alanis morrisette and Ryan Reynolds!!  

What I really want is to marry an NBA basket ball player. Tall and sporty. They don't have to be super good looking because I won't be able to see their face most of the time because my eyesight is not great and looking up to that height will be tricky!

Oh god I really want a pair of Havianas NOW random comment but that's me! Some people. Have that sudden craving for cheese, chocolate whatever but me give me those flip flops!!!