Escape to Nowhere

There are times when one can feel so trapped in the bubble they have created for themselves, that you can feel as if you are suffocating in your own air! The air becomes stale, you lose that thirst for life and frankly everything seems like a chore! It's a feeling of deficiency, a bit like anaemia but with anaemia atleast you know after a couple of weeks on the old iron tablets, you will feel better. This deficiency goes deeper.
Do you ever just get that urge to leave the city, leave the island, get away from materials, technology, general social activities that makes us who we are? I want to walk,I want to walk and walk. The further the better, the more remote, the better. Where do i have in mind? Namibia!!

I know what everyone is thinking, how can you shed yourself of all those materials you love so dearly, the shoes, the bags the dresses?? Yes perhaps I will miss them but absence makes the heart grow fonder doesn't it? I am not that much of a Princess that I need to be surrounded by luxury all the time! Quite frankly, the way I feel, I would throw it all away........NAH!!!! The fact that I would even say that should mean something n'est pas?

What is making me feel this willingness to enter a world of anonymity?
Is it that one is entering some kind of identity crisis and is in search of the reason behind it?
Could it be that life in the real world is moving to quickly and there is a need to slow down and re-boot?
Possibly both of these.
For me, it's a combination of the two, and a god almighty head ache that I can't seem to shift. I need to get out, I need to get out now!!

Just the thought of walking in the desert, with only the moon as my guide brings me some kind of escape, my thoughts take me there but it's not enough. I need to be there to escape this suffocation. I need to be free.

What Have I stubbled Upon?

That dear friend of mine I mention on a more than frequent basis said to me “don’t go looking for love, love will find you, and in the most unexpected place” I have to hand it to her. She knows what she’s talking about.
Ok, so it has been quite some time since my last “confession “ as it were, and I have to say things, and by things I mean the romance, has escalated to whole new level. We talk for hours without tiring we email continuously, and we text till our fingers are sore!! We are multi-media connected!
How was the 1st kiss?? That’s the funniest part, yes we have known each other for almost a decade, but that 1st date has not happened as yet. We are almost at the crucial date and the anticipation is killing me!!
Is this love? How do you know? Do you need to be in one another’s presence to feel that chemical reaction? Is love feeling the other person even if they are not around?
He makes me feel like a Princess and isn’t that what every girl secretly wants? Despite my happiness, I can’t help but feel that it isn’t really real until the day we secure the decision we have made to be with each other.
I seem to be focussing a lot on my love life these days and neglecting other quirks but seriously this has me baffled! How did this happen? I was content in the know that I will be alone and yes everyone needs that special someone but when you get to a certain age, you become comfortable with yourself, and selfish and self sufficient.
Luckily for me I still feel like a teenager so I am not affected by the above and thus I am embracing this . I’m excitable. Guess what ???? I think I found him: My Prince, My Soul mate, My Friend.

The Zone

Everyone has that place in their head which the call their “happy place” and this place is unique to every individual. I have one of those places but I wouldn’t exactly call it my happy place, I would call it my rabbit hole, my hiding place, my invisibility cloak. My special place is a zone located on the black line where no one knows who I am. I have pure anonymity. Just a place for me, myself and I!
I love this place. Here I have the perfect figure, the perfect romance, the most fantastic wardrobe and no worries. Obviously this is an imaginary zone because there is no woman in the world who is 100% satisfied with their body not even Miranda Kerr, and the perfect romance.......does that actually exist?
So you can see why I spend so much time in here. There is something about this place, it’s as if someone is watching me living in this bubble and so you behave in a particular way here, and every now and again, smile and random thoughts that pop into your head. By this point you must think it is time to make contact with the psych ward but just stop and think about it first, do you have one of those places?
I am currently residing in that place now and I don’t want to leave it. The weather is beautiful. Waking up to the sun shining is the start. I enter the zone as soon as I awaken. Ok imagine having the most fantastic dream and then the alarm goes off......annoying right? Well being in the zone is like being in a dream all the time. So when I wake up in the suntrap, I still feel like I am in the dream because it is the sun that is the key to entering the zone.
I am on the verge of finding the perfect romance, and my figure well yes it’s at a satisfactory acceptance stage so am I actually in the zone for real? Very close....very very close.