2 Peas in a Pod

Just when you have given up in trying to find a soul mate and you think nobody really understands you and your quirky genius ways; you find them, and it’s the person you least expect them to be.
It takes time before you are comfortable in your own person and realise who you are, it is at this point that you can really connect with others as you know who you are yourself. This totally sounds like a self help book but following recent events, I actually believe it!
The other pea in my pod has been in my life for many many years but has never been an actual part of it. In fact I can safely say that we were tolerating one another for the sake of our friends, but if the choice was there, we would never have met ! Our personalities are one in the same and that’s where the clash came and thus we went our separate ways and then…….WE GREW UP!
At a recent reunion, we started all over again and thinking about it, it was actually the first time in our connected lives that we were both single and may I add, happy! We were able to get to know each other, talk, laugh, joke, philosophise on life and as strange as it seems to both of us, flirt!
Is there a connection between these two definitely possible soul mates? Well, actually, yes. We think the same, we write to each other at the same time, even dream the same. The conversation is so vast and ever exciting and when the conversation is stops, the thoughts keep on coming. Are these two star crossed individuals meant to be together? Have their lives been written in such a way that they must walk on a rocky road before they are lead to the same path, leading them both to “that” orchard?
There is that odd tumble dryer feeling in my stomach, that feeling that you cannot altogether identify. Is it excitement? Is it fear? Is it apprehension? It could very well be all three.
I feel there may be a little love story developing but shall leave destiny to work it’s magic.

Blue

What is the best “perk me up” remedy when you feel so blue?
Be thankful that the mood is not red for a start, and once thanks have been given, get on with trying to climb out of the blue hole. So, I have to break it all down. What is it that is causing this emotional infarction? Could it be the fact that I am missing the Emerald Isle and the occupants, especially one and the fact that the distance is clearly an issue? Could it be I have forgiven someone who does not deserve forgiveness and thus letting my cool exterior melt? Or is it something else? The fact that I am sick and alone and need my mum?
Well it’s all three. Now comes the job of freezing that exterior again and overcoming the emotion turmoil. I don’t feel like making a purchase.... that shows clear delirium, or it could be the fact I treated myself everyday last week and Sunday should be the day of rest for the wallet as well as the mind.
The worst part of all the drama is that I actually feel myself sinking and entering the red zone and thus do not have much time left before I reach the place of no return!
When I am in the pale blue zone, everything is so simple, a good glossy- when I say good I mean Vogue, Bazaar, Marie Claire, Not Heat, Grazia or some other gossip trash. So yes a good magazine, a cup of herbal and a warm room. When I edge into the navy zone ( this seasons shade of blue featuring on Ralph Lauren’s collection); I need to step it up, manicure, spot of R.T and complete alone time, throw in a fashion show just to boost the confidence and smile at the fact that I still fit into the tiniest pair of jeans despite indulging tin cake the night before! What do I do now though?? Get a tattoo? Yes, that’s it, distract the mind of emotional turmoil. I feel slightly drained by people’s negativity, trying to pull me down, but the mother ship is back!! Nothing can touch me now! I love my Mum.

Is it LOVE or is it LUST?

When you get to certain age, I think it is very difficult to determine the difference between love and lust. Sometimes it is just the idea of love that you love and thus put the feelings you have into the love box and totally bypass the lust box.
Let me explain, following on from the bold statement made in the last entry…. Confessions of a Vogue Girl Part Deux. Falling in love with a beautiful Irish man. Is it love or is it lust? Well, it isn’t really possible to fall in love in just 1 night is it? Or is that what they call Love at first sight?
When a boy holds your head in his hands and kisses you adoringly, is that love or is it the way to make a girl weak at the knees?
He held my head in his hands and we kissed and then kissed again, it was as if no one else was in the room despite there being over 300 people around us, to me it was just me and him. To me it was like falling in love, to him, it was a score, in the morning, it was a score for me and for him it was like falling in love.
A wise lady once said to me “Don’t go looking for love, love will find you and it will happen in the most unusual place. You can not allow people to fix you up with their friends or have an aunty find you a suitable boy; you have to allow your self the freedom to let it come naturally. It has got to be real, and it has to be for you”. That is the soundest advice I have had in a long time, and you know, it is so true.
If you haven’t fallen in love for a long time, you forget what love is. How do you know what love really is. It is different for everyone. Different people have different specifications and although that may sound very scientific, that’s exactly what it is....... a science!

Confessions of a Vogue Girl- Part Deux

Following the Confessions of a Vogue Girl, I have to ask the question- do we all suffer from some form of obsessive compulsive disorder. I for one can safely say I do. It is not the loop the loop kind whereby you can’t stop washing your hands or you have to have all the bottles in a straight line and if that’s not the case you want to top yourself, no, the kind I am talking about is when I just want, want, want! I have a cupboard with shelves stacked high with every kind of jeans. I have bags of all makes, I have shoes, so many shoes, flat ones, heels’ ranging from 2inch to 7 inch, open toe, round toe, pointy toe, and the list goes on, and yet I can’t seem to get enough of buying more.
There are reasons for this obsession and thus I believe are positively justified. Shopping is therapy and for someone who needs a little perking up now and again, what better way to perk you up than with a therapy of the retail kind. With the weather remaining miserable, I find myself getting very bored with the wooley fashions and crave for the day when I can pop on a pretty frock and slip on a pair of Giuseppe Zannotis. The problem we face is, or rather the problem I face, is that the shops are bypassing the poor weather conditions and exhibiting their summer stock! How can a girl resist. So I buy the dress, and haven’t the blood circulation to wear them.
On a recent visit to my escape sanctuary I had the conversation with one of my nearest and dearest friends, one of my inspirational women actually. Why do we feel like we have to keep buying and what is it that makes shopping so therapeutic. When you are having a god awful day, why is it that going shopping and making a purchase seems to change transform those angry pissed off feelings into little clouds of endorphin filled pillows? Those pillows remain of course until the next bad day which is usually the very next, and then followed by a puncture when the credit card bill comes!
When one gets married, those habits need to change as there is another person in the equation. Buying is more a recipe for guilt than a guilty pleasure. As much as I try to justify the spends, those justifications do not work on those with another half.
The OCD doesn’t stop at the shopping; there is the other obsession, the boy! The beautiful Irish boy that makes my heart skip a beat......swoooooon!